What was I doing almost a year ago?

In short, waiting and hoping that Caleb Sheridan would arrive any day...

July 25, 2009--eager to meet my son (and be done with it already!)

The hospital bag was mostly packed albeit those things you always throw in at the last moment: contact solution, toothbrush, razor, etc. I'd been working on my nightly pelvic exercises and stretches. Also continuing to slather on the cocoa butter lotion (which didn't really help me prevent stretch marks). I remember sitting in the glider in his finished nursery often, rocking back and forth ever so slowly, telling him how we couldn't wait to meet him. It was surreal, having everything ready to go, just no baby yet. I wondered what motherhood would be like. Could it really be as challenging and yet so amazingly wonderful at the same time as other moms had led me to believe?

What about labor and birth? Would I end up having to be induced? Would I be able to handle it? His due date was August 5th, 2009. I kept imagining having to call Brent at work and saying, "Honey, I think I'm in labor!" Which is funny to me in of itself, because I don't refer to Brent as "honey." :) Would I be out in public and have my water break?

At the end of my pregnancy, I really enjoyed speculating and imagining everything. I wasn't anxious about it really, just wondering how it'd all go down. And I'm sure God had fun listening to and watching me pose "What if?" scenarios.

He knew all along. He knew the moment that Caleb Sheridan would make his grand entrance. He knew the joyful tears I would shed at his birth, and the heartrending tears that would come during the following weeks. He knew that He would give me strength in my weakness and carry me through. He heard my cries along with Caleb's, begging for mercy and that most precious gift, sleep. He knew that things would get better, it would just take awhile. He knew that I would grow to appreciate the new normal. He knew that I would become more dependent upon Him.

But I did not know of these things yet. Little did I know that I would be meeting my son very soon, just a handful of days later on July 31st, 2009.